Friday, June 20, 2008

Terminology

"So you're basically leaking."

"What? No. I'm bleeding."

"Which means you're leaking blood."

"OUT OF A BULLET HOLE!"

"Yes, yes, the blood--normally contained within your body, a mostly-sealed unit, is now leaking out of a hole in that unit."

"Because I was shot!"

"Because you were shot. You're leaking."

"You asshole."

"Hey, man, I'm not the one who refuses to acknowledge--"

"You colossal asshole! You total fuckup! This is why I wanted to take an ambulance, this is why--"

"--and here I'm letting you leak all over the leather in my new car, all because you--"

"I'M NOT LEAKING!"

At that moment, the engine died.

"Uh."

"You king of douchebags."

"I bet it's the alternator. There's been some bleeding in the engine, and--"

"Oh, so the engine bleeds?!"

"It's a mechanical term!"

"IT'S A BIOLOGICAL TERM!"

"We have to walk."

"I've been shot! In the chest!"

"Your shoulder."

"I'm not walking!"

"Well, clearly, you're just sitting there bleeding. The hospital's like a block away, you didn't get shot in the legs, come on."

"Emperor of assholery..."

"Lean on me. We'll be there in a second, god, don't--leak on my suit, would you?"

1 comment:

William said...

This is why guys have more fun, we're assholes to our friends.